“Marital secrets serve no purpose but to alienate you from the only one who can provide the level of intimacy you truly desire as a sexual being. If you keep secrets from each other, you may build a wall between you and ultimate sexual and emotional fulfillment.”

“Marital secrets serve no purpose but to alienate you from the only one who can provide the level of intimacy you truly desire as a sexual being. If you keep secrets from each other, you may build a wall between you and ultimate sexual and emotional fulfillment.”

“In order to keep your car running smoothly, you must have a routine of preventative maintenance. In order to keep your marriage running smoothly, you must follow a similar policy. … You cannot allow your relationship to run its natural course, or it will suffer from the neglect ... Separation is the normal direction of marriage, so your efforts are to thwart that drift and keep your relationship on the … course leading to togetherness.”

“While our hearts will find their rest only when God is part of the equation, it is a stunning scriptural fact that soon after creating Adam and Eve God declared, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone’ (Genesis 2:18)—even though God delighted in his relationship with the man. Clearly God created us with a need to enjoy other relationships besides Himself exclusively, but God must be at the center of our hearts, to which all our other relationships are then added.”

“Compromise can be a way of saying, ‘I love you.’ It’s proof that we’re willing to give ground for no other reason than that we value the ongoing relationship more than we do asserting our rights, preferences, or wishes. Compromise is the cement of fellowship.”

"God’s primary solution to human aloneness is the oneness, companionship, and togetherness of having a spouse.  When husbands and wives distance themselves from each other, they are fighting against God’s plan for their marriage and missing out on the blessing of oneness that God designed for them."

“Compatibility is not necessary for oneness—sacrifice is—and that’s something every man and wife has to learn.”

“Much of Christian teaching has gotten it exactly backwards.  We’re told that if we want to have a stronger marriage, we should improve our prayer lives.  But Peter tells us that we should improve our marriages so that we can improve our prayer lives.”

"No other human relationship can approach the potential for intimacy and oneness than can be found within the context of the marriage commitment. And yet no other relationship can bring with it as many adjustments, difficulties, and even hurts."

“Marriage is far more than a cultural institution or an arrangement for a man and woman to meet their needs for companionship … There is more at stake in your marriage than just two people trying to meet one another’s needs. God’s reputation—His image—is at stake in your marriage.”

“Whatever I do for my spouse, I do it to Christ as well. A husband’s unconditional love for his wife reveals his love for Christ. The husband who loves God should love his wife also … A wife’s unconditional respect for her husband reveals her reverence for Christ. The wife who respects God should respect her husband.”

“Love is a sacrificial, other-centered action that provides what’s best for the other person. God’s way is very hard on the feelings, but it’s very healthy for the soul. It works wonders in relationships where both parties find their ultimate identity in Christ.”

“God is completely, totally, enthusiastically supportive of your every effort to build a strong, God-glorifying marriage.”

“Life is war, and marriage provides us with a close and intimate ally with whom we may wage this war. The battle requires bold love, forgiveness, confrontation, and repentance.”

“We learned that sacrifice is the language of romance, and selfishness is the language of isolation and rejection. Commitment inspires one to sacrifice, and sacrifice makes commitment a rare jewel to be cherished.”

“In marriage, God wants to take us on a lifelong journey to become what we were meant to be, to experience Him more and more, to understand a hint of the relationship and unity God knows Himself within the Trinity. This intimacy is a mystery, but it makes marriage a heavenly journey and not merely a biological coupling.”

“Twice a year, we highly recommend getting away for at least an overnight stay—without the kids. … This could be as simple as checking into a hotel across town, or a trip to another city. These getaways are especially important when you are faced with certain decisions ... Furthermore, when both spouses share in the decisions that increase and decrease pressure, they take ownership of the direction of their marriage, which can minimize tension.”

"If you are going to run the race of life and not become a casualty, then you must learn three critical elements: First, to run together; second, to run at the same pace; and third, to run in the same direction."